By Rose White Young

Bereavement is an inevitable part of life. Usually bereavement is associated with a loss of a loved one, may it be an immediate family member, a friend or even a colleague. The death of someone close to our heart brings sadness as well as pain. The severity of emotional pain, loneliness, or trauma of losing this person can lead to intense grief. Grief and bereavement are interrelated in such a way that both emotions can lead to depression.

The death of a loved one brings different emotions such as disbelief, anger, guilt, sadness, painful yearning with the deceased and unable to function physically and socially. These are the same emotions experienced by a person in grief. The degree of sadness and pain brought upon by this loss to an individual may vary depending on how close the relationship is with the deceased.

The period of grief often referred to as mourning usually lasts for at least six months to two years with varying degrees. However, it can often take longer.

As time goes by, the emotional trauma brought upon by this death of a loved one should lessen. It is true that time heals all wounds. There may be scars, but the pain is lesser.

There are cases wherein grief brought upon bereavement so intense may lead to depression. A person may grieve over a death of a loved one but not necessarily mean suffering depression. They can feel the sadness and anguish over the loss but can cope. Those persons at risk of depression often experience pensive sadness, no appetite resulting to weight loss, constant crying, sleep problems, lack of motivation and inability to function normally which includes going to work and refusal to make any social interaction. When the bereaved person remembers the happiness shared with the deceased, the sadness and longing may become more excruciatingly painful. A feeling of worthlessness sets in because of this loss, thus suicidal tendencies may come with the depression.

The best treatment possibly for a person suffering depression due to bereavement is having a support system. In this support system, immediate family members of the deceased should accept the fact that death is a part of life. It is not the end of everything. Each and everyone should have confidence that life goes on. Death of a loved one does not mean there is no chance for any happiness for those left behind. Cooperation of every member of the family is necessary to make a recovery from the loss. Mind is powerful enough to change a person’s life, thus positive thinking will be of great help in recovery from the bereavement.

But in reality it is so difficult to accept that time is a healer when you have just lost a loved one. I think it is unnecessary to tell someone who has just lost a loved one that time will heal all their problems. I think it is the last thing anyone wants to hear after a recent loss. Empathy for a person’s situation is far more beneficial. The best support you can give someone who has lost a loved one is offer support and listen to what they have to say. Do not try to fix their problem, after all it is unfix able because their loved one is lost forever to death.

I also think that acceptance of death comes to a person when they are ready and able and telling a person to accept their situation is cruel. I totally understand that grief and bereavement can cause depression and can be life threatening. For that reason it is always best to encourage the bereaved to talk to a medical professional if they are unable to talk to family and friends.